Surveillance State is Watching the World Go By

This is a story about watching the world go by and not existing as a real part of it. Not in a cheesy, sadboy, 2012 Avril Lavigne kind of way. It's about observing, noticing and questioning societies but not being able to function as part of them. It's about the constant state of non belonging and being a witness rather than a participant. It's about undiagnosed disorders and neurodivergences. I am pulling from my own experience as a queer immigrant with severe anxiety and delusional dreams. This paralysing fear of embarassing oneself manifests itself at the same time with this painful desire to belong and merge with the rest of the world. All you can do sometimes is just stand in front of your window watching. Observing. Internalising. Analysing. Copying patterns. Imitating gestures. Smiles. Ways of talking. Surveilling. Not being surveilled. Barely being acknowledged at all. The eyes become CCTVs, the mind becomes emotion, emotions become absurd.

Creative director, stylist, photographer: Tudor Covaciu | Make Up Artist: Ines | Hair Artist: Viktoriia Karmanova | Retoucher: Nur | Fashion Assistants: Chanel Baker , Rubee Graham , Marilena | Talent: Bruk and Jasmine, via Revolt Agency